Tomorrow
As the world goes 'round I stare out the window at a cold and dreary valley. Cars rush by in their incessant need to keep time flowing freely and quickly; so quickly that my body gives up before my mind even knows its been running. Alone in this room, in this dream of peace, silent tears stream down my cheeks and soak the foreign cushion that holds my lifeless body. My mind is raked with torment of wishing I could be home; wishing he could be home. Internally I curse them for sending him away, but for everyone else I am happy. For the rest of the world I turn my eyes away and put a smile on my face; keeping the silent tears silent. Nobody wants to know the pain that overcomes my body when I think of him on the other side of the world, nobody wants to know of the vice on my heart as I see the affection of husbands and wives, of mothers and children. If he were here he would rescue me. But he isn't here. I hate the reasons that he had to leave, but I am proud of his honor, his sacrifice. He is gone, so I must rescue myself. I must drop to my knees and ask for a miracle. Cry the tears for the one who will listen, the one who will strengthen, the one who will care. Through this I can learn to get up from this lonely room and enter the rush of life that so frequently constrains my heart. I will rescue myself.
Tomorrow.
I pray for that miracle every night. You make me cry Kar I'm sorry you and Mutchell have to go through this trial. But I am glad to hear that at least this is his last deployment. He'll be back with you for forever soon :)
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